There is absolutely no way in hell…

               When I meet someone of interest of the opposite sex I tend to examine a few things right off the bat such as hygiene, habits, and mannerisms to determine how long the conversation will last or how long they will be around.  Now I don’t have a checklist because I think that is absolutely ridiculous but I do have some “there is absolutely no way in hell” automatic red flags. 

In no particular order here are some top turn offs:

Ugly Shoes

               I think it’s safe to say that within the first 2 minutes of conversing with an individual EVERYBODY takes a peak at the footwear the other person has on.  Both male and female will tell you that ugly shoes or even worse dirty shoes will decrease the depth of any conversation.

 My eyes go face, stomach, thighs, and then shoes.  I’ve seen plenty of attractive females mess up a perfectly cute outfit with some bum ass shoes.  Three inch heels and flats are the worst thing mankind has ever invented.  All I can do is shake my head.  I’m a shoe enthusiast so I’m very particular about the shoes my woman wears.  I literally could go shoe shopping with a woman all day. *shrugs* I just like shoes.

               I had a situation once where I was dating a female and we were about to go out and meet up with some of my friends for drinks and a casual evening out.  I pull up to pick her up and as she walks down the steps on her way to the car and of course the first thing I notice is her shoes.  I absolutely hated those shoes and she knew it yet she still put them on talking about they were comfortable and shit.  Trick don’t you know beauty is pain?!?!  Yep, I parked the car and turned it off until she agreed to go change shoes.  Call me shallow….I don’t give a shit but I was not about to be represented by this woman with a pair of shoes on I didn’t like.  I’ll tell my woman in a minute if she doesn’t like what I have on to please express that to me because I will go and change with the quickness.  I take criticism just as well as I deliver it but that’s a whole different story for a totally different day.

               At the end of the day THERE IS ABSOLUTELY NO WAY IN HELL will I date a woman who consistently wears ugly shoes!

Ugly Feet

               Now this is pretty much self explanatory.  Men tend to get away with having some roughed up ass feet but best believe more and more women are about to do away with that.  Say what you want about being manly but you better go get you a regular pedicure with your woman.  Hell chalk it up to quality time.  Me personally, I don’t get pedicures because I’ve always taken care of my bunyans.  Despite being an athlete all of my life I have some pretty descent looking feet if I may say so myself.  You’d be surprised how washing and moisturizing (in my case cocoa butter) your feet on the regular will make your feet look.

               Remember in Boomerang when Eddie Murphy was in the bed with ol girl and he pulled the covers up to see her feet was jacked smooth the fuck up?  Yea, I’m definitely not trying to have that happen.  You can get away with wearing socks for only so long but eventually those feet have to show.  I can’t phantom the thought of being laid up with my woman during an intimate moment of cuddling and she proceeds to rub her ugly ass feet on me.  That will turn me all the way off! 

               I personally don’t like feet and prefer for my woman to keep them off of me BUT that shit just isn’t reasonable nor will it be acceptable by a very affectionate woman.  With that being said at least let your feet be attractive.  I mean hell if I’m going to be giving you foot rubs, you’re going to be playing footsie with me in the bed, or if I end up sucking them one day……..keep them thangs together for me! PLEASE!

Again…THERE IS ABSOLUTELY NO WAY IN HELL I’d date a woman with ugly feet!

Stank Ass Breath

            Look a here…brush your damn teeth, rinse your mouth, or pop chewing gum or mint strips on the regular.  Now I know you may not always be aware when your hygiene isn’t up to par so just be conscious your shit might be a little tart depending on what you just finished eating.

               Eh…….now that I think about it……………there is no excuse! Handle that!  I can’t have a straight face to face conversation with you if it feels like I just nosedived in a sanitation land field.  I’ve heard plenty of conversations with women talking about how they saw an attractive guy; he came over to spark a conversation with her, and before the second word came out, she bout fainted.  Ummmm yea…check that!

               THERE IS ABSOLU………man just brush your teeth AND tongue!


            I like to call them cancer sticks but whatever you choose to call them they are one of THE biggest turn offs in the dating community.  I’m not too fond of black and milds either but I absolutely will not date a woman who smokes cigarettes.  Wayment…I lied!  Anywayt hey smell horrendous and look like something only a redneck would do.  They leave this horrible smell on your clothes and have your hair smelling like the bottom of a seat cushion in a trailer park. Mannnnnnn I don’t see how folks do it.  Ever kissed someone after they just took a drag off of a long ass Virginia Slim? 

Watching a woman roll a blunt turns me on though *shrugs*

               Now don’t get me wrong.  I’ve dated a woman that smoked before.  Didn’t last long but it wasn’t because of the smoking though.  She knew my stance on cigarettes yet at the same time she knew I wasn’t going to judge her….to her face.  She never smoked around me and she always made sure she either brushed or scoped before kissing me.  Would I date another female that smoked? I don’t know but it definitely is a turn off.  If I can look past that then there is obviously something about this chick that I really like.

Last But Not Least…

               Share what your biggest turn offs are.  Some may be unexpected and others would definitely like to hear.  I know I always keep my ears to the street to see what the new or updated standards are with women so share some.  Fellas too, we always at the bars talking about random do’s and don’ts some female have done.  Let us hear it.

*Chucks a deuce*

Enjoy your Thanksgiving and Be Easy